Speech Essay

"Fragile. Handle with care, don't fall not pressure."

 

Many of the delivery boxes in front of my dorm building have stickers, warning that the product inside the box is fragile to external shock. On the way to my dorm room, just the thought of unboxing new deliveries make my heart flutter. Living in an isolated boarding school in the countryside, delivery boxes are one of the few ways for me to communicate with the unknown outside and the trend of the world. To fulfill my desire of shopping, and satisfy my greed, I keep buying some delicate goods from the internet and displayed them on my desk. Waiting for my orders to deliver was the only lovely expectation during a repetitive everyday routine in school. 

 

Usually, the things I order are decoration pieces and delicate objets or glassed cups of a unique design. These are beautiful decorative items that come up in google when you type ‘aesthetic glass’ and search there. To be honest, those pieces have no practical value for me in terms of improving my study. The only thing they do is provide me pleasure through their fine, delicate, and sophisticated looks. You can think of this habit of mine as a meaningless practice and a waste of money and time. I do think so too. However, they attract me with their shiny glassed surfaces on websites. After a long hesitation inside of me, I finally succumb to my temptation to buy them. 

 

I can guarantee that I am rational and have always been down to earth. That is why I can’t understand myself buying impractical and useless stuff with satisfaction and justifying my doings of purchasing those. To make an excuse, it feels like I see myself in their frail, delicate, and vulnerable exterior, which is like a matching hypothesis in psychology that claims of we, humans, feel a primal attraction to things and people that resemble us. This explains the perception of similarity promotes feelings of mutual rapport and positive sentiment between the two, as well as the expectation that further interaction will be rewarding. I, the one who hides just like a proteus man who strives to adapt well to changes in society and organizations by changing their appearance and trait, also even in my private place and to myself, just want something beautiful, something that reflects who I am. 

 

Always suspicious of myself, and who I am, and consider myself a man of principle, do not falter, even suppress my emotions, especially weak-minded feelings. And my emotion beneath the surface is just expressed without control as a projection of my purchases. I project and reflect my weak self on glassed decoration pieces that I don't acknowledge and love. I am hiding under the surface of the delivery boxes, meaning that I am fragile, but I pretend I am not. 

 

One day, I was looking forward to receiving a pastel pink mug, which was my birthday gift from a friend, and I just opened the box with a thrill when it arrived. The thing welcoming me inside the box was a shattered glass that I couldn’t recognize the original shape of it. The pink shining powder of glass was fluttering the interior. My state changed from expectation to surprise and disappointment, to carefree and relieve. The broken pieces made me cry, but my tears were not only for the upsetting result of my expectation that I felt when I was waiting for the mug but also for the joy that I overcame something. I know that even though the mug is cracked, my weakness is still inside, and I found myself hatching from my delivery box and facing my fragile inner side.